Things Are Gonna Happen Naturally.

Was it you who spoke the words
that things would happen
but not to me?
Oh things are gonna happen
Naturally.
Taking your advice
and looking on the bright side
and balancing the whole thing.

I'm on a compleate music high. ever listen to music that just makes you happy for around two hours? If you havent then i know im crazy. One day, i listened to music for over four hours. just did homework and chilled and sang and listened. You might think im insane for wanting to do this, but it was the best thing in the world. you just get so happy. :)

and its okay

if you had to go away

just remember the telephones

well their workin 'em both ways

but if i never ever hear them ring

if nothing else i'll think the bells inside

have finally found you someone else

and thats okay

'cause i'll remeber everything you

sang.

all form the lovely Jason Maraz. Normally, i would not listen to this kind of music. but he fits my care-free mood.

Oops, sorry!

It just kinda hit me.

my blogs are bitter.
i've been a bitter child lately.
i feel like changing that.
sorry if any of my posts got you down,
that isnt the point of them.
i just need a place to put my thoughts.
i'll try to think happier ones.
because im tired of being sad.
im ready to be happy again.

:)

Josey, Its alright.

I'm comming home,
I'm comming home.
Did you take off while I
was gone?

so. Homecomming is comming. Really fast.
I dont have a date! :/
i have no idea what im going to do. There is no way im going on a pitty date, thats pethetic. and i refuse to go with a group of friends: it just shows how much you wanted a date but didnt get one.
i have a friend who has been asked a billion times by a billion different boys, and i have another wh0 is going with this new kid (its like he fell from the sky, or something), and yet another buddie who has three guys after her. and Its killing her because she doesnt know which one to chose. then theres the girls who have official boyfriends that make official dates. and then theres me.
I have no official boyfriend, no one to ask me but my very strange simi-friend, and no chance of going. It makes me sad.
i feel stupid. me and my petty shallow problems.

i wish i was deep.

Eyeliner and Cigarettes

Promise I'll be kind
But I wont stop until that boy is mine.

Bad day today. Just a little mad at my friend.
but I'm not going to confront her. there is no need to.
shes just... kind of leading on this guy.
who honestly has enough problems. I feel bad for this kid.

Not a good day, not a lot on my mind.
that's all.

Carter's Gonna be So Mad at Me...

'Cause she is only 15
and she is more then willing
to take a chance
to find romance
to grow up fast
but I
know she is so much better
then to give it all away
to the first guy
first try
first lie
first good-bye

My current favorite song- fifteen by NeverShoutNever!

if you havent heard of him, look him up... right now.

so anyway he wrote this song about a girl he knew, only the age of fifteen. and he noticed she was getting into some more "adult" things. she was trying to grow up too fast.

I love the song and i love NeverShoutNever! but i think hes being a little hypocritical. these lyrics are comming from the guy who had sex at age 16! so hes being very hypocritical.

Apparently sex is normal in highschool. at least at HSE it is. it drives me crazy. It just blows my mind. I understand it because i've gone through enough experiances to relate. I'm just 14? thats a whole year younger then this girl that Fiftten is about. I guess people these days dont get that kids go through more then they realize. Sex, drugs, drinking, friend drama, family problems, depression, and soo much pressure. sometimes it feels like the pressure will dissipear if you just give in. but honestly, its highschool. that pressure wont go away, no matter what. you have to just learn to get around it.

maybe theres a way to stop it.

but what do i know.

im just 14. and i've made too many mistakes to know what to do.

Do Your Really Believe That?

what am i suppose to do
when the best part of me was always
you
what am i suppose to say
when im all chocked up and
your okay
im falling to pieces
'cause when a heart
breaks
no it dont break even.

oh highschool. what are you doing to me?

what really confuses me in big bad highschool is all the relationships. who breaks up with who always seems to be important. but who really cares? the point is that they broke up.

and theres always that kid who cant get over his or her last relationship. i understand if your a girl.

ladies. your moody and impulsive when it comes to guys. and you have a bit of a deeper emotional bond. so it can be a little tricky to let go or move on from your last boyfriend (or in some cases, your last girlfriend.)

But come on guys. get with it. it was just a girl. not the best football player in the world and not your trophy wife. just a girl.

so why in the world do some guys stay hooked on that last person? that last girl who made their heart jump a little? Arn't guys suppose to be brave? i use to think that for a guy it was extreemly simple and easy to get over a girlfriend. but apparently not. i have a friend who thinks he is just dieing inside without his last partner. it kinda shocked me to hear this. hes usually not like this, but for some reason, hes compleatly lost. i have to wonder if its just his mind flipping on him. maybe hes totaly convinced that he can not live without this girl, and now that he has thought about the subject enough he believes it. But then again, he might actually love her in that way.

personally, i dont believe love exists. not in highschool. but maybe outside of it there are a few lucky people... who DO fall in love. so highschool guys and gals. get over it.

I Fell Into Pieces, and She Fell Into Me.

Still thinking.

So a had this big thing with some random guy I met at a party. It was a couple of weeks long "relationship" even though we were not even close to dating.
But things still got very... personal i guess i could say? really physical.
At first i was a little high off of all the new stuff i was trying. but it kinda started to die down and i haven't talked to the guy in forever.
I didn't think i cared, but after having today be an 'amazing-find-yourself-through-talking-to-a-friend' day, I'm not so sure anymore.
Me and my Buddie Emma talked about issues for about an hour. (the time slipped by fast.)
and i didn't really speak of my problems when it comes to this guy because i didn't know that i wanted to. Now I'm at home, tired and sad, and i really want to talk. I want a best friend. i want them to tell me things are going to be okay, and hug me until i stop crying.

So Say Hello...

here i go. first blog.
scary stuff, right?

Sure, bloging seems like fun. So far i feel pretty good about it. but what do i know, i just started.
I also thought a bit about it. A blog is a strange thing.

Some people type all about their feelings, just to vent a little. While others use a blog to talk about other people such as celebs. personally, when i think of the word 'blog' i immediately jump to the word 'gossip.' people actually get paid and become famous for blogging. (example: Perez Hilton)
but why DO people gossip? what is it about talking about others that is so intriguing? I guess by pointing out other peoples flaws makes our own seem less noticeable. But gossiping is a HUGE flaw. It shows that you can't be trusted. Its not like i don't do it too.

I'm Guilty.

New rule of mine: no gossip. no talking badly about others. never.

I'm gonna try my hardest to make a difference in myself. and it all starts with this blog.